Sunday, August 5, 2012

DNS By the Numbers

Disclaimer : I never would've normally registered for a 5k while injured. I was told (and was delusional enough to believe) that I had a strain/sprain/tendon damage, by an Urgent Care "Doctor".
I believe he got his degree from Pretend University of Magical Fairyland. (Go Flying Caticorns!!)

By the time I got a real diagnosis from a real (dreamcrushing) doctor, my entry fee had been paid.

When I realized I was going to have my very first DNS (Did Not Start, in racing terms), I made an easy decision. I could wallow in more self pity while all my running friends and family had fun at this inaugural event, or I could volunteer and join in the excitement.

Had I not chosen the latter, this would be a blessedly short but grumpy post. Instead, you can relive the joys of my DNS, broken down in Numerical Fun-Style!

0 : The number of times I obsessively checked my alarm on RaceDay Eve to make sure it was properly set. Turns out "I get to Volunteer, tomorrow!!" doesn't hold the same sort of excitement.

314 : The bib I never got to pin on

4 : The number of safety pins I saved for another racer (go me!!)

4: The number of safety pins my sister-in-law needed, that I neglected to bring. (Sorry, Kristi-Anne!)

100: Pounds of ice I got to load into the trunk of my car

3: (this number may be higher) Number of traffic violations I involved myself in, while transporting volunteers to and from our designated posts. I think my passengers were not totally unhappy about getting out of my vehicle. (sorry fellow volunteers!)

100+ : Number of times I shouted out a time (I was at Mile 1), followed by "Keep it Up!" "You're doing great!" and the like.

6 : Number of times I tried to frantically call my Race Director friend. Full disclosure/Funny sidenote: She called my cell, right before the start of the race.
Her : "I'm going to put my phone down so you can hear me say "GO" and then start your stopwatch." Me: " Ok, got it! Bye" (disconnect on my end)...immediate headslap and frantic return calls.
Luckily, the wind was blowing just right and I actually heard her yell "GO" and  the rest of the crowd as the race started. Crisis averted. everyone knows about my dumb move. (Sorry, Jennifer!)

1: Very tasty celebratory beer I shared with my sissy. It was her first post-baby race and she rocked it!!

100+ : Smiles I gave my fellow runners, family and volunteers. In genuine happiness. People were kind and supportive about my injury, the race, brought to us by this cool new company went off beautifully and everyone had fun. So much fun!

0: Number of times I thought "Dangit! I wish I was racing instead of helping out and cheering for and with my friends!" For real. It never crossed my mind.

Have you ever had to DNS?

Any cool/dumb/scary volunteering stories?


  1. I'd just like to say--

    'Flying Caticorns' would make a great name for a rock band.

    Also your bib number is nice as pi.

    That is all.

    1. haha! The husband had almost the exact. same. responses.

      Not surprising...

  2. I've had to DNS in May and wrote this HUGE blog about it. I think the key to surviving without wanting to kill someone is keeping busy & involved in the race if at all possible. So I got to cheer for my kids like it was no one's business. Then stare at the results and get really crabby only to be resolved with dessert.

    1. Ooh. I'll have to go back and read that, now. I'm glad you able to throw your un-used energy into cheering.

      Dessert really fixes most problems, doesn't it?

  3. Your presence as a volunteer was wonderful! You were definitely the most sincere-sounding encourager along the route. I heard a lot more, "Go left"s and "Yeah"s (without an exclamation point) than nice, smiley "Keep it Up!"s.

    Unfortunately, I don't have a legitimate injury to blame for my recent DNS. Therefore, I must blame my baby. She *was* only 6 weeks and 1 day old on race day...
    I shudder, still, thinking about that morning. "Not ready to enter a race" would be a nice way to re-word "Slobbery sobbing mess".

    1. You certainly were a hot mess, that morning. :(

      Yet another reason to be excited about you far and happily you've progressed with your running!!